What's the Value on the Table?

Why would anyone want to meet with you?  What might you bring to the table?

I have had to face those two questions alot recently as I have been expanding my training business to Cleveland.

Each business person I approach with the request to chat over a cup of coffee, I am sure they are thinking those two questions and sometimes they are saying them right out loud!  It is a little humbling to say the least!

Here's what I think I bring to the table:

1.  I am a good creative listener so that even though I am new to that area, I have already figured out helpful connections to make.  That may be just a natural ability that I have, but I think everyone can do this if they work on it a little bit.

2.  I like hearing the story of each person and many times just being able to tell his or her story makes a person's day.  

3.  I learn from each person.  They may not know that they are teaching me, but it is the little things they do or show me that make my selling just a bit easier.  One gentleman just recently gave me the perfect words to say when a prospect uses the objection that they are already doing training.  When I have received this type of help, I let people know how much they have impacted my life.

4.  I am willing to donate my time to volunteer within the community as much as I can.  While it may not be as much as someone who lives in Cleveland full time, I figure every little bit helps.

5.  I'm good at sharing what I've learned about each person with others that I meet. I help their message to travel farther!

So for those of you breaking in to a new location or a new territory, determine what you offer when you are getting acquainted with your new friends!

Please Help Me!

Jennifer Blakeman asked a great question the other day. She wanted to know how much you should share of yourself during a one-to-one meeting.  Should you actually share that your business is barely hanging on and that you need referrals, or should you just keep a stiff upper lip?

Great question!

And the answer is one that everyone is going to hate!  IT DEPENDS!

• If this is someone new that you've just met, that level of confidence is probably going to scare that person away 

•  If this is someone that you've known for a long time and with whom you have shared other worries, if would probably be OK.  I would phrase it carefully, though, asking for advice or ways that they think you can jump start your business.  

It's really all about the level of relationship and the length of time you have known the person sitting across from you.  No one wants to sit through a pity party, so look at this as an opportunity to open your brain to new ideas on how to promote your business.  

Also think about the people you are choosing to meet with.  Are they referral partner material, meaning, do they want to help and have the same target market?  If not, while it is not a waste of time to meet, the time spent could be better used if  you were more strategic in selecting people to meet.

Did I miss anything? 

Scary Meetings

My friend, Yvonne Goodwin, asked a great question about one-to-one meetings recently.  Her puzzlement was about people who ask to meet with her and then proceed to "throw up" about what they are selling during the whole time. Her comment was, "If I ever do that to someone, I hope they will tell me right away!"

The real question is how to guard against that kind of "backed into the corner" setting.  So here goes:

1.  When someone you don't know well or at all asks to meet with you, it is quite alright to ask the reason for the meeting.  The inquiry might sound something like, "Can you tell me what you'd like to accomplish as a result of this meeting?"

2.  I have been so bold as to explain that it is very unlikely that I will become a customer, but that I am willing to meet to get to know each other better.  In other words I set the tone of the meeting.

3.  If I get caught in a situation where the person is either dragging out their sales materials or beginning a sales pitch, I will stop them and again reiterate that I am not a prospect, but that if we just get to know each other, that perhaps I'll be able to help in the future.

I think the most important fact to remember is that the people who violate these rules do so because they don't know better. Or even worse, sometimes they are trained by their company to stalk prospects.  You can help them to modify their approach which probably means you are helping to ensure their future success.

Any thought on this?

Knowledge Needs Updating

I am having a ball and learning so much from this new project of meeting two new people per week.

Yesterday I had the pleasure of spending some time with Emily Hardcastle, who works at the University of Toledo at the Catharince S Eberly Center for Women.  She is the community outreach manager.  I am familiar with this center, having given some presentations for them years ago.

So-o-o-o-o, I still thought they did what they did back in the old days.  And they do, but now they also have so many other offerings.

Back when I contributed, their target market was mainly women in transition.

Now in addition they provide services for professionals and also students at UT.  They have an unbelievable calendar of programs including topics as far ranging as computer basics to a high ropes course.  (That might be right up my alley!) If you are in Toledo or nearby, check out all they have to offer.

It's not your mother's Eberly Center anymore!

But What do I Have to Give?

Those new to using networking as a business tool are sometimes mystified about how to use this tool!

One day I met with a young woman, new to the area, and she was puzzled by how she could offer anything of value to people she met with.

I explained that as she met each new person, she added to her resource directory and that each new person gave her the opportunity to make a connection with that person and someone else in her growing network.

She literally sat back in her chair, thought for a second and said, "I just would never have ever thought of that!"

Networking can be the best way to become a valuable person to your friends, because you will bring added value to them.  And that's what networking is all about. 

What else would you have told this young person?

Cornered

I just did a one!

What's a 1, you ask???

Well, I can't take credit for the term, but it means that I met with another person who monopolized the conversation for most of the time.  My friend, Sandy Pirwitz, who is a BNI Director, is the one who coined the phrase several years ago when caught in a similar situation.

But I think it's more embarrassing and frustrating for me because I'm known as the networking guru.  I should be able to manage better, right???

WRONG

This person watned me to know how wonderfully intelligent he was and also that he is an authority about everything...including areas of referral networking.  Including.......(fill  in the blank).

I had asked to schedule the event because this person had expressed a complaint about a program I oversee.  I wanted to hear his concerns and then hopefully solve some of those issues.  That didn't happen because this person didn't want solutions.

What did I learn from this situation that will help YOU in the future?  I wish I could give some really good advice here, but the only thing I have to say is just don't schedule with the type of person a second time.  Once burnt is enough.

Maybe you have some advice for me?????

Chairs and Networking

In our home I am the one who keeps the dining room chairs snug up to the table when they are not in use.

Recently someone who was providing services in our home, would leave for the day with the chairs slightly away from the table and also each angled a little toward the other. At first this bothered me and I would put them all straight! Then one evening I really looked at the situation. The way they had been left actually made me want to go sit there. It had hints of a previous conversation, too. Actually it invited me to come be part of the scene.

I got to thinking about this. I preach approachability in the networking world having borrowed that term from Scott Ginsberg. I asked myself, "Am I uptight or am I approachable?" What little adjustments can I make to allow people to feel comfortable entering my space?

I don't know the answers yet, but I'll be thinking about this question all week.

What would you do?

Picky Eating and Bonding

OK, so here's the deal. I am on the Thin and Healthy Solutions Weight loss Plan and it is really, really working well and it's easy. So I am a little compulsive about what I am putting into my mouth. I had an appointment scheduled today with a fairly new contact, Luigina Boes. In the past we had been at some of the same networking meetings, but always had missed connecting with each other.

Now you have to get the picture.

I was standing at the counter at
Flying Joe Coffee Shop in Perrysburg, OH trying to figure out what to order. I'm supposed to have decaf, which I'm stomaching, but not loving. Additionally, I had just done a quick workout, so I was hot and thirsty. I was asking the barista all kinds of questions about what she thought I could have that was cold, low-fat, no sugar, low calorie and yet tasted good. (I don't want much!) Luigina, basically was doing the same. Right away, we bonded! It was just too funny. She's an exercise nut, and while I can't call myself that yet, I am headed in that direction.

Without even beginning our official chat, we had found our level of commonality. And it was interesting to see how much more we shared with each other in the next hour. We were comfortable with each other.

Finding a common point of interest (or as Scott Ginsberg puts it, CPI) makes for a strong relationship that begs to be developed even further.

Thanks, Luigina, for not thinking I was crazy with all my food questions!

Secrets of Success

Many times I use the BNI member bio question of "The secret to your success is...?" as part of my introduction when I am about to give a talk ou t there in the real world. I have several answers to that question, but the one I use most often is 3-fold. It is:

1. Do the next thing
2. Make time for others
3. Fake it till I make it!

#2 is the one I want to focus on for this post.

Making time for others means that I don't get something else done. Having learned in my Bridges Out of Poverty (a whole 'nuther topic for another day) seminar that because I am part of the middle class, I am an achievement machine. That's how I measure my success personally. So that being said, I am at loggerheads with myself when I make time for others, because I don't get something else done. (I know, I know, meeting with someone can be getting something done.)

Getting something done for me is being able to check the "next thing" off my to-do list.

But here's what I have found out. (I'm a slow learner!) Many times, meeting with someone will either automatically get something else done or help me to get do it in the future. Let me give you a couple examples.
I met with old friend Mary Ann Mills. She and I know each other through Women's Council of Realtors of which I am an affiliate member. In the past year because of schedule conflicts I have not been very well connected with the group. Just a short meeting with Mary Ann helped me to understand that I can do some things that will help with this connection.

I met with Tina Roth, a BNI member who asked for my help in getting her ten minute presentation prepared. I teach this training for BNI but it's not on the schedule to be offered again very soon. That old voice inside my head was telling me all the stuff I should be doing to help put people into my upcoming courses, instead of meeting with Tina. But because of #2, I did. And at that meeting, Tina gave me her registration form to be in my course.

The path to my success is truly not very straight, but if I follow the three tenets that I use for my speech introductions, success meanders my way.

What's your key to success?

And You Went, Ate and Left?

It always amazes me how with a little encouragement, a room of very diversified people can help each other.

Last Friday, we had our first Educational Preview of the year for the Certified Networker course. The ultimate goal is to have people want more of what they're given in the two hour session, so they register for the course. Devious, aren't we?

A second, very important objective is to get the participants to connect with others in the room so they can help each other. Sometimes it works better than others. I don't think it has anything to do with the occupation of the people. I think it has to do with if I'm "on" that day in presenting and also with the attitude of the participants.

Last Friday was the best. Right from the start I could tell that this group had "a helping mindset." When we had a break, even though my direct instructions were, "To get with the person in this room you can help," they didn't hesitate. They immediately wanted to trade cards and schedule appointments with each other. It was fun to watch.

So my question is, "Why doesn't that happen with other networking groups?" I am particularly thinking of chamber events. It is my experience that people come to eat, try to sell themselves and then leave.

How can we change that mindset, so instead people arrive early to connect, find out what others need and then schedule appointments before leaving? Or is that like trying to turn an ocean freighter at sea?

Contest!

It's contest time!

Yep, that's right. International Networking Week is coming up real soon as it is February 4 - 8. This year Certified Networker of Ohio is again sponsoring a one-to-one contest to see who can have the most meetings during those five days.

For those of you who do not know what a one-to-one meeting is, it is exactly as it describes. It is two (and only two) people meeting for the reason of getting to know each other better.

We'd love to have you participate. To do so, you can register at the website here. You'll find the info in the upper right corner of the home page. You can register now but cannot begin to list one-to-ones till 12:01 AM Feb 4 and can continue to list until midnight Feb 8. You are on your honor that these meetings are actually happening.

The prize for the most one-to-ones is $100 which will be presented at the CN monthly lunch February 20 if you are from the NW Ohio area. If you live out of the area, you will have to produce a mailing address for the check to be sent. Obviously, we will want your story too, so you'll have to be willing to be interviewed. Then we can relate your success to the world!

Some people are already getting their meetings scheduled for that week. Kathy Stringham, owner of Coffee News of Monroe, our winner from last year, managed to have 29 appointments and the contest was only three days. Her secret was staying in one place while her appointments came to her.

Don't delay. Go register and then begin scheduling. Everyone will win, because you'll get to know the people you meet with that much more. You'll be able to help them and they'll be able to help you.

OK, let's predict. How many one-to-one meetings do you think the winner will be able to have in five days this year?

What Do You Want?

There nothing better than meeting with a person and coming out of that meeting with a LIST of people I need to tell about that person....or introduce that person to.

That happened today.

I met with Cassie Egli, owner of Super Suppers, a dinner preparation business here in Perrysburg, Ohio. Cassie and I talked at the WEN (Women's Entrepreneurial Network) meeting the other day. She mentioned that she was somewhat frustrated because she didn't think her fellow BNI members were working on her behalf, when she's working diligently for them.

I'm pretty good at figuring out why people are having those problems, so I thought we could share a cuppa' coffee. After we talked, I left the hour-long meeting with all kinds of people on my list that need to know Cassie. She left with a better idea of how to be more specific with her weekly commercial. She also is going to introduce me to her former boss who might be interested in Certified Networker. Oh yeah, she is also going to consider being a sponsor for a community event that I'm working on, too.

Here are the types of people I'm going to connect Cassie to:

1) Girl Scout Council program director
2) A partner in a CPA firm that wants to have dinner with her children during tax season
3) A Realtor who is a self-described member of the sandwich generation
4) The executive of the Safety Council of NW Ohio
5) The owner of a home care agency
6) The HR director of a very large local company
7) Same above description, different name.
8) An insurance sales person

And it doesn't end there. One of the people I emailed about Cassie, emailed me back immediately saying "Yes, yes, I want to meet her. This is right on. Thank you, thank you!" So I get to look like a hero.

All it takes is little time, two listening ears and the confidence that my contacts will react positively. Without the one-to-one meeting, this would not have all happened. Without Cassie becoming more specific, this would not have happened.

Give us a story about someone you met with that ended in a similar fashion.

And the Winner Is

Last night at our first graduation of the year for the Certified Networker classes in Northwest Ohio, we also announced the winner of our first ever One-to-One Contest. This event helped to celebrate International Networking Day.

It was no surprise to announce that Kathy Stringham, Coffee News of Monroe, Bedford and Sylvania was the top contestant. I blogged about how Kathy set herself up for success a couple days ago.

Now let me tell you the results.

In three days, Kathy had 29 One-to-one appointments! The contest rules required that each appointment be at least 15 minutes in length. I think Kathy planned for hers to be 30 minutes. Instead of thinking only of herself, she planned in advance how to help the people she was meeting with. Over the three days, she asked each person to come to the meeting with three names of either people or companies that they want to connect with. But let me have Kathy tell you about it!

"From what I count right now I made 44 connection points between the people I met with. I still have some work to do to follow-up, but it is exciting."

When Kathy accepted her award last night, she said that winning was fun, but knowing that she was able to give to the people who had helped her by agreeing to meet was even better. She knows that these appointments will help her in the end, but additionally, she has been able to give back to her community.

How would you have organized this contest to help others?