Givng but not Getting

A couple months ago I received a call from someone I didn't know, but they used the name of someone I did.  This new person we'll call Herb, wanted to schedule an appointment with me.  I very carefully explained that I was not interested in what he was selling, but that I would be happy to meet to see if there might be a way I could help.

The day of the appointment he was very appropriate and likable.  I could think of several of my acquaintences that would be good connections  for him.  I have since taken my time to make those personal introductions happen, three different times.

Also, I happened to meet another new person, let's call her Sally, who would benefit from meeting Herb, so I asked Herb to come to a networking event where Sally was going to be.  Herb agreed.  At the last minute Herb bowed out.  "Something had come up."  Herb also asked me to save him a seat in a preview that we give of our course, which is basically two free hours of training. I'm sure you've guessed it, last minute, "Oh gosh darn, something has come up."

While I meet new people with no expectation, when I go the extra mile to help them, I expect that they will want to enter into the concept of giving back to others, too. 

Is this too much to ask?

Chairs and Networking

In our home I am the one who keeps the dining room chairs snug up to the table when they are not in use.

Recently someone who was providing services in our home, would leave for the day with the chairs slightly away from the table and also each angled a little toward the other. At first this bothered me and I would put them all straight! Then one evening I really looked at the situation. The way they had been left actually made me want to go sit there. It had hints of a previous conversation, too. Actually it invited me to come be part of the scene.

I got to thinking about this. I preach approachability in the networking world having borrowed that term from Scott Ginsberg. I asked myself, "Am I uptight or am I approachable?" What little adjustments can I make to allow people to feel comfortable entering my space?

I don't know the answers yet, but I'll be thinking about this question all week.

What would you do?

Skuttle Butt

My friend, Scott McBride, Ray of Life Healing Center, attended a seminar that I co-presented with my friend, Jenn Wenzke, on Wednesday evening this past week. Of the 30 attendees, Scott was the only guy and he knew this going in. I call that brave!

But here's the reason why he wanted to attend. Many people who he respected had told him that he needed to meet Jenn. And while he could have asked for an introduction, what better way is there to get to get to know someone than to hear and watch them present?

After the presentation Scott was able to talk with Jenn and compare the areas that their careers might cross.

We can all take a lesson from Scott.

Who do you want to meet?
Are they presenting anytime soon?
Can you attend the event?

Obviously, if the answer if "no" you'll have to move to plan B, but if, "yes" then get your butt in the seat!

Do You Want Me To Tell You How Wonderful I Am?

Today I read something that made me cringe. From another consultant's column was the suggestion to wake up every morning asking, "Who am I going to be introduce myself to today."

Why the yucky feeling?

While I'm sure his advice didn't mean this, I sort of got the picture of a networker going out and handing out his cards willy-nilly to make sure he was introduced to newbies. The old deal the deck routine.

Instead, I'd like the advice to be, "Who are you going to introduce to someone today?"

I'm sure you get the slight difference. Helping others first is the hallmark of a great networker....in my opinion, of course!

What's your take?

Winter Wander Land!

Finally, we got some snow and it is a Saturday! Yay!

I know many of you probably want to strangle me for this glee, but I spent my growing up years playing outside all day, all year long in Western NY. That meant playing in the snow drifts and having a ball. So there!

Anyway, I strapped on the cross-country skis this AM for the little tour of the back ten! It was pretty quiet out there and I didn't see any animals, but I did see lots of tracks. It was fun trying to create a story for each set or marks.

"Oh dear, did all the mess of tracks mean that there are a fight for ones life? Don't know."

"Oh dear, did the two sets of tracks represent a rabbit with a coyote in pursuit? Don't know."

"Oh dear, where the two sets of rabbit track went separate ways, mean they were playing tag? Don't know."

Then I got to thinking. What if all these tracks represented networkers? Was the muddle of tracks a picture of one networker over powering another with their sales pitch? Or was the larger set of tracks following the smaller representing, someone stalking another business person. And did the third set represent networkers having a lot of fun, but not really being strategic about their time spent.

You can see why my friends think I should not be let out alone very often!

That said, what would your networking tracks look like?

This past week I met with a new networking friend. She happens to represent a direct sales company and I'm always a little hesitant when meeting with folks who are independent representatives of such businesses. I don't know whether they are badly trained by the companies or just don't know better in the way they act sometimes.

I can say with great approval, that the coffee meeting went very well. We were both relaxed and just took the time to get to know each other. We found out that neither of us are the sorority type and that we just like the easy ordinary way of life. I want to get together with this person in the future and am already thinking about how I might help her.

Conversely, recently I met someone who represents the very same company and the meeting was entirely different. This person had dollar signs in her eyes and commission breath. I mean, she just couldn't stop talking about (or actually selling) her product. You can guess that I really don't want to meet this person again any time soon.

What can we learn from this? Relationship-building, which is the hallmark of great networkers, takes time. It typically takes a few meetings before each participant feels comfortable with the other. Those who try to "rush" the relationship, never get to the second or third meeting that will help to develop helpful friends, because they have scared those very people away with their overbearing sales job.

What is your experience with this?

Where, Oh Where Has My Name Tag Gone?

Name tags are important in the world of networking. Scott Ginsberg says it best, so I need to say nothing further.

When students of the Connext Nation course graduate, they receive a name tag with their name and company name in big letters, plus our c/n logo in the bottom corner.

Students from the previous course were offered have name tags that reflected the name of that course. Many of those grads want updated name tags because they are proud of being a member of the CN community no matter which course they took.

So in May, I asked all who wanted name tags to order. Many did. I had about 7 that I needed to send out via the mail, as I wasn't going to see these grads very soon. They were all mailed at the same time, in padded envelopes, with my return address on them.

Fast forward to a couple weeks ago. We are now again about to order name tags for our newest grads. I sent an email out to the community letting those who didn't order before know that they had a second chance now.

Then it happened. I started getting emails saying, "When am I going to get my name tag from before?" Sure enough, all seven that I mailed never made it. I dug out my receipt, thinking that even though they weren't insured that maybe they could be found, thinking they were in some mail sack someplace.

What do you think the answer was? You got it. "Can't do anything."

Of course, I will replace those name tags, but I am out $70 plus mailing expenses.

So you wonder why the post office is failing?????

As an aside several weeks before the name tag caper, we received one of those nice letters from the state of Ohio, saying that we had never paid our income tax for 2010. Of course it had been mailed from the very same post office on the due date. Hubby called our CPA and he said, "Oh that's the fifth call like this that I received this week." We thought the state had probably lost it, but now I wonder if this PO has a black hole in its backroom.