Many times I hear from acquaintances that something is not working for them. Typically it might be membership in an organization or even a referral relationship with another person.What I always find interesting is when I ask, "So tell me what you've done to make it work."
More times than not, the person complaining, has focused on the negative and has not moved away from that point of view. That colors everything about the situation.
For example, getting referrals is so wonderful. Giving referrals and not ever getting any in return is not so wonderful. Instead of focusing on who's not giving, change the viewpoint to why you're not getting what you want.
Usually what I find when I ask is:
The person who wants referrals has not explained exactly what they need, instead just saying, "Send me anything."
The person who wants referrals mistakenly assumes that since they've given a referral to someone that the person will automatically know to send a referral back.
Changing these two situations will probably mean that something different will happen. And what is for sure is the negativism is gone.
What have you done to change a bothersome situation?
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