This past week I had the experience of having the best and the worst in the medical world -- and it was all about relationships.
Wednesday, I had my final follow-up appointment in regard to my cataract surgeries. I expected a 2 minute appointment with a doctor that I didn't even know, basically to get my eyes measured for a new eyeglass prescription. When the doc asked how I was doing, I answered, "The cataracts are great, but my dry eyes are horrendous." I expected him to defer, because of course I was not his patient in regard to that condition. He surprised the heck out of me by sitting down and spending about 45 minutes (or so it seemed) with me, facing me, making eye contact and giving me information and resources that I had not been given by any other doctor. He also gave me his card that included his personal cell phone number that he pointed out and said, "Please text me if you have any questions or want me to prescribe the drug that I gave you a sample of." For those of you in the Toledo area, this gentleman's name is Dr David Bejot. I would recommend him highly.
Thursday was another story. I had an appointment with the dry eye specialist at the Kellogg Center at the University of Michigan. In November I met with this doctor. He prescribed a treatment where my tear ducts were permanently closed. I told him that I was willing to do this, but that it was not going to solve the problem, because I had had Puntal Plugs (which do the same thing until they fall out) for years and it helps, but doesn't solve the underlying problem. He told me to be positive. Well to make a long story short, as I had thought, it didn't work. The reason for my second appointment was to determine what advanced treatments I could get. I also took my daughter-in-law along and my hubby. During the appointment, the doctor agreed that more serious treatment was necessary and he suggested the PROSE lens. Hubby asked, "Will she wear those for the rest of her life?" and the docs said, "Yes, until she can't."
Well, of course I wanted to know exactly what that meant. He gave me a another non-answer and
then turned his back to me to work on his computer. When I asked again to understand what he meant, he lashed out (still with his back to me) and said that he felt like a two year old with my questions. At that point my daughter-in-law spoke up and said, Dr. ______, "I think you need to adjust the way you are speaking to my m-i-l, because no one speaks to her like that." I then asked what the first step in the process was. Again no answer. Still his back to me. At this, he stood and said, "Follow me." What he was doing was taking me to a scheduling desk to make an appointment to see the doctor who actually fits the lens. BEFORE ALL MY QUESTIONS WERE ADDRESSED. I would NEVER recommend this man even if he were the last doctor on this earth.The medical community is pushed to rush patients through appointments by insurance and big medical companies that want more patients per hour. I totally understand that. BUT, I challenge each of them to actually see the patient as a person, a real live person. Even if it is only for two minutes. It's all about the relationship, or in Thursday's case -- not! And for those of you wondering. At the scheduling desk, the helpful lady said that Dr. _______ had noted that I was to come back in 4 weeks to see him for a follow-up. My d-i-l stood up for me and said, "No, we would like to choose a different doctor."
I became aware of a couple helpful tips during my medical journey last week.
1. Don't assume that a doctor can't or won't help!
2. If I am being bullied, I can leave the appointment immediately.
3. I will always take someone with me to these types of appointments in the future.
4. I can change doctors just because I want to!
5. I have a right to be treated with respect my anyone, including those in the medical community.
After all, if my relationship with the doctor has not garnered a bit of relationship and credibility, then, I won't be assured that this person can help me.
What has been your experience in regard to medical communication?
